Cinema Paradiso is where I had my first ever date with a guy. It was November 1993. We held hands as we watched the Kenneth Branagh – Emma Thompson version of Much Ado About Nothing. It’s also where my friend Garry and I saw five movies in one day at the 2016 Spanish Film Festival….
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Jun
England captain Joe Root made exactly 50 on the first day of the Boxing Day cricket test. Above is my Boxing Day 50. Don’t worry. As we say in Perth: ‘But it’s a dry heat!’
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Dec
I’ve been looking for an opportunity to post about Chita Rivera. Stephen Sondheim’s death makes it time. I once paid $500 to spend 45 seconds with Julie Andrews. That was just for the meet and greet part. It was over $700 if you included the show beforehand. Chita Rivera’s one-woman show at His Majesty’s Theatre…
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Nov
Back in the nineties, I had a friend who in turn had a CD collection that cost him $27,000. He played me tracks from Forbidden Broadway and Forbidden Hollywood, which parodied tunes and made fun of stars. Ten years later, JJ took me to see the show Forbidden Broadway in an off-Broadway theatre. The creator,…
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Nov
I hadn’t been to Araluen Botanic Park, on the outskirts of Perth, since my twenty-eighth birthday. That must have been about ten years ago.* I went back yesterday afternoon to see the Roleystone Theatre perform The Taming of the Shrew. *May not be true
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Nov
One feature of growing up in the late seventies and early eighties was the Sunday night serial on the ABC, which we used to watch together as a family. We, the Accused was about the unhappily married school teacher in the 1920s who kills his nasty wife and runs off with a younger woman. For…
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Oct
I come from a family with a long line of green thumbs. My thumbs are more of the dead variety. Palm trees can survive in deserts, but not in my garden. My excuse is that I was travelling a lot, and didn’t have time to do mundane things like tend to plants. But now I…
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Oct
I may have been the only person in WA not to watch the AFL final – the only time we’ll ever have it in Perth – or will it be? – but even I joined in the festivities in Forrest Chase the day after, on my way to the gym. I think someone should do…
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Sep
I went op-shopping this weekend and bought this for two dollars: The chapters include ‘Training Techniques and Workouts’, ‘Strength Training’, ‘Eat for Health and Performance’ and ‘Mental Toughness’, but maybe a few others didn’t quite make it into the book…
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Sep
There used to be a Cold Rock Ice Creamery in Northbridge, directly on my walk home from the city. It’s now Red Rooster, so I have replaced one readily accessible naughty culinary indulgence with another. The nearest Cold Rock now is in Scarborough. Today, I got them to mix in extra cookie dough to the…
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Sep
It rained in Perth on 28 of July’s 31 days: the most since 1946. The total amount of rainfall was the most in July since 1995. Today, though, I took the train to Grant Street station, walked along Grant Street to North Cottesloe Beach, and on the sand or the footpath… … down to Leighton…
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Aug
Don’t you find that sometimes when you go to something to support a friend, it’s like – wow! I should have gone anyway! What else have I been missing out on? A new calibre: From Disability to Ability is described as ‘[a]n energetic array of paintings, digital works, sculpture and photography by 16 leading artists…
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Jul
Recently, the Post newspaper group got a letter about the Rubik’s cube toilets in Geraldton and asked me if they could use a picture of them from my blog. I was very happy to say yes. I’d always seen myself as a writer more than anything else. Photos were more something I needed to make…
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Jul
Yesterday, I went to two events at the Perth International Cabaret Festival. The first was a free workshop by Michael Griffiths and Amelia Ryan. I got to perform one of the songs that I sang in The Sound of a Social Climbing Nun (my revisionist take on ‘Edelweiss’). I was a tad nervous because Michael…
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Jun
My quest to see all 29 movies at the Spanish Film Festival involved me taking the train to Fremantle to see this low-budget Mexican production with four interconnecting stories about young people. Although the programme called it a comedy, I thought it was too serious for that, even though there were some light and funny…
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May
This year’s Spanish Film Festival featured Ema, which I saw in March at the Somerville. The title character and her husband (played by Gael García Bernal – pictured above) adopt a child, but give him back after he burns Ema’s sister. Ema later has regrets. But no fear. The publicity material proclaims: ‘SHE HAS A…
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May
I particularly related to this film at the Spanish Film Festival because it was mainly set in Argentina in 2003: the year I first visited that country and began my random love affair with it. For me, the currency crisis at the end of 2001 meant that Argentina became a much cheaper place to visit….
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May
This movie at the Spanish Film Festival is about a boy fleeing through the Spanish desert in 1946. The young actor who plays him handles the confronting subject matter extremely well. Luis Tosar (pictured above), who plays the man he befriends, has – for me – become one of those ‘It’s him! It’s him’ actors….
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May
Cancer was the subject matter in the comedy Wishlist, which I saw at a journo preview for the Spanish Film Festival. It’s interesting what does and doesn’t work with comedy. When I performed The Sound of a Social Climbing Nun, I suggested the Maria in The Sound of Music was eaten by cannibals. That always…
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Apr
One: Because it’s happening (we hope!), having been cancelled in 2020. It’s due to start on 28 April. Two: Because Mario Casas (pictured above) is in one of the films. I’ve seen him play a determined but naïve rock star, a father reconnecting with his family, a ruthless killer giving a false narrative, the romantic…
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Apr
Perth’s Hyde Park in a dry summer still has at least ten.
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Feb
Last year, I wrote an advanced draft of a comedy show that I planned to stage at the 2021 Fringe World Festival. After COVID hit, I kept going, but by June, I felt too exhausted by everything. I couldn’t imagine learning the script. I was also worried that Perth might get locked down, and I…
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Feb
When I first saw this in the Perth CBD, I thought they were bringing back public hanging. But I’ve got over my cynicism and I find it quite striking. Though I wonder how easy it’d be to bump into.
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Jan
Just off Hay Street Mall in Perth.
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Jun
After the 9/11 attacks in the World Trade Center, Perth’s obscurity made it a good place to be. But after a few months, other places were much more happening. This time, with COVID-19, Perth’s obscurity is even more of a plus, but I also know that when things go back to normal (or whatever normal…
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May
Okay, it wasn’t like my friend’s picture from Malaysia … … but I was grateful that I could buy eight double rolls last Monday at the local IGA.
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Apr
… has been put off. I’ll have to content myself with everything I learned from the 2015 festival and memories of 2018’s opening night.
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Mar
Aidan Jones sounds like a suburban Adelaide middle-class name, but this talented comedian is the product of a backpacker fling that his Adelaide middle-class mother had with a Colombian. Or is he more like the stepfather who helped raise him? I’ve heard talks on nature vs nurture before, but until now, they never involved the…
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Jan
… used to be death, taxes and Adriana Xenides turning around the letters on the Australian version of Wheel of Fortune. Adriana is sadly no longer with us, but this weekend, I spotted her longest running co-host – John Burgess or Burgo – in Hay Street Mall. There was a time when I’d try to…
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Dec
For some, the dream retirement would be to travel and paint. My friend Tim Sewell (pictured above) does plenty of both. On Friday night, I saw some of his works at his most recent opening in Café Café, Subiaco. For me, this piece brought back a singalong with three naughty US citizens on the TSS…
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Nov
At a time when you could buy a decent house in Perth for twenty thousand dollars, MGM agreed to pay Julie Andrews – the world’s number one box office star – a million dollars to do a movie. When it came time to make it, they paid her a million dollars not to do the…
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Oct
How would the people on the sinking Titanic have felt if told that 105 years later, they’d be immortalised in a Lego exhibition in Perth?
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Oct
Last night, some friends took me to Cine Vivo, a movie night in a cute room in the centre of Perth. The main feature was the documentary Chavela. All I’d heard before I entered the room was that she was a Costa-Rican born Mexican lesbian who smoked cigars. But the documentary showed her to be…
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Sep
… this platter from the Norfolk Hotel may help change that.
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Aug
The book’s title is a tad optimistic, but in 2003, this book taught me basic grammar and words before my first trip to Argentina. I’ve learned the language in many ways since, but I never actually finished the book. Today, I went back to the beginning and did the first two and a half chapters…
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Jun
… is to see them all. Which is what I intend to do at the 2019 Spanish Film Festival. After 30 movies in 14 days in 2015, this year it shouldn’t be too difficult to watch 31 in 22. There are actually 32 films, but I saw Crime Wave, starring Maribel Verdú (pictured in the…
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Apr
I originally went to the Perth Stamp & Coin Show today because my friend Ian Boulton is running it, and I thought it’d be good to see and support him. I expected to pop in, say hello, have a quick look round, then leave. But then I encountered this perspex of Diana, which I thought…
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Mar
The woman above is very British, very sweet, very charming and very funny. She also throws very sharp knives, very fast and (thankfully) very accurately! I saw her show at the 2016 Fringe World, and it was terrifyingly good. She included some subtle touches, such as some wicked signs at the back of the set….
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Jan
My experience last year of seeing Mercedes College stage The Little Mermaid made me think back to 1985. Methodist Ladies’ College was putting on The Enquiry – an unladylike play set in a women’s prison – and needed two boys to play the male roles. So I played the Reverend John, the chaplain, described in…
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Dec
Germaine Greer was born before the start of World War Two. Which means that she’s about to turn eighty. Yesterday, she flew across the country to speak, for an hour, without notes, at the University of Western Australia. And spent the next two hours and twenty minutes signing books, posing for photos and talking to…
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Nov
One or two people were probably worried when I said I was putting on a show called My Argentina at Fringe World 2016. Who was going to pay money to see a middle-aged man, who’d never done fringe before, talk about his travels, the Spanish language and an Evita doll? But I marketed it diligently,…
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Nov
Now that the season’s over … You’re one of the few people who’s appeared in court as a lawyer and done a stand-up comedy show in a pub on a Friday night. What are some of the differences? In court, judges don’t check their messages, chat to their friends, order another round of drinks or…
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Nov
I was particularly nervous about this one, because it was being videoed. As usual, I walked to the Pirate Bar, but a block or two away, I took five minutes to chill. I stayed chilled on stage, and slowed down some of the moments, adding pauses to get the best effect from the lines. I…
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Nov
If you’ve seen my show, thank you so much! Please feel free to post photos and comments on my michaelfromperth Facebook page. You can send me a message, including if you want to read the missing three paragraphs of the scene with the housewife and Latino hunk (but if that’s what you’re after, please don’t give…
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Nov
I’d never done a 5 o’clock and 8 o’clock show on the same night. It involved hyping myself up, then down, then up again, then down … It helped that there were two great crowds, including friends from Adelaide, Busselton and Dunsborough.
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Nov
This October/November, I’m doing another show in Perth! To BOOK, please click here. What’s it called? How to Write a Tasteful Novel. Did you really write a tasteful novel? Yes, set mostly in Argentina. How many lessons will you teach us? Twenty, including why it’s best not to write in a clothing optional resort. We only…
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Nov
I was very happy with this performance. And what a crowd! It’s affirming to see so many people smiling and to hear them laughing. Some of these pictures came out a little Lucille Ball from the movie Mame. (You can google that reference.) Not such a bad thing, as I approach a milestone birthday.
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Nov
Welcome to HOW TO WRITE A TASTEFUL NOVEL! I was always destined to write a tasteful novel about Argentina. Tonight, I’ll share twenty lessons so that you can write your own tasteful novel. With a Latino hunk, a naughty housewife, Nancy Reagan, Snow White, Jackie Collins and unladylike behaviour in a ladies’ college, you can…
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Oct
In the course of preparing for my new show How to Write a Tasteful Novel (tickets still on sale!), I ran my publicity material by other people. One time, my printer was running out of ink. It was meant to come out like this: I kind of like the new version!
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Oct
Last year, they showed 35 movies in Perth at the Spanish Film Festival. I saw all of them. There was one overwhelming theme: banks! In this movie … … men robbed a bank, and got away with it: In this one … … other men robbed a bank, and got away with it: In this…
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Apr
I’m not normally very good at capturing sunsets, but Puerto Natales, Chile, 2005 was my favourite: Until now. I didn’t go much to the beach in the Perth summer just gone. So I popped down to Swanbourne this evening. At first, I thought I’d missed the sunset. Glad to be wrong.
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Mar
One unexpected bonus of going to Spanish class was that today about 25 of us got to make paella in the backyard of our teacher Estefanía (pictured with me below). We started with chicken in the centre of the pan (or capsicum in the case of my group, as we were doing vegetarian), put it…
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Mar
This year, in Perth, I’ve seen the slogan telling us to ‘forget boring’. Well, I forgot it last night at PICA when I saw ‘The Second Woman’. Not all of it, as it involved the same actress doing the same ten-minute scene 100 times with 100 different men, over the course of 24 hours. We…
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Mar
When I did my shows at Fringe World, I put on previews. they were a chance to iron things out before opening night. They also meant that I had, in a sense, two opening nights: one official and one unofficial. A preview isn’t meant to be quite the final product, so the ticket prices are…
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Feb
People have asked me if I’m performing at the 2018 Fringe. The bad news is no. The good news is that I’ve just finished a draft of a new show I’ll be performing later this year. It will be tasteful.
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Jan
The past week in Perth saw an outpouring of nostalgia for the WACA Ground, which may well have just staged its last cricket Test match. I was there on Day 4, and after donating a gold coin, for just enough of Day 5 to see the Ashes change back into Australian hands. In 2013, when…
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Dec
This monologue inspired me to write a tasteful novel, which in turn inspired me to perform my show HOW TO WRITE A TASTEFUL NOVEL. I wrote it in 2007, when Perth’s mining boom meant it was impossible to get tradesmen (and they were always men) to come around, and same sex marriage was a bit…
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Oct
In 2002, I proved my credentials as a serious lawyer by appearing in make-up and a blue wig on Rose Hancock Porteous’ reality TV show. But wait! There’s more! Around this time, I also went to three garage sales at her mansion Prix D’Amour, which was French for Price or Prize of Love. At one…
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Aug
This is Jennifer: It’s actually a Samsung S8, but one of my cousins has named it after Jennifer Hawkins, the former Miss Universe. Jennifer is my first regular smartphone, and apparently quite an advanced model. My cousin thinks that as a gay man, I wouldn’t appreciate all the wonderful things about Jennifer Hawkins. Likewise, as…
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Aug
Given that I’m over 40, I’d like to think that 35 isn’t too old to win Wimbledon, so I’m glad Roger Federer recently proved this. He didn’t even lose a set, which makes me hope that they’ll soon have a 37 or 38-year-old champion. Martina Navratilova won the US Open mixed doubles when she was…
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Aug
Like Julie Bindel, a controversial British writer, I don’t think of myself as childless. Rather, I’m child-free. Fathering children has never particularly interested me, which is probably just as well, because despite technology and laws, it’s not exactly the easiest thing for a single over-40 gay man to achieve. If circumstances had forced to raise…
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Jul
I had planned to see all the movies at the 2017 Spanish Film Festival, but sadly, I think I’ll only be able it to about 35. It starts in Perth on 27 April at Cinema Paradiso, and is also on in other Australian cities. Opening night features Kiki, Love to Love, starring and directed by Paco…
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Apr
In case you missed it, last week, I posted this picture of me: It was the thirtieth anniversary of me (or to be more precise, my friend Frank’) bleaching my hair. I recently used the picture in my show The Sound of a Social Climbing Nun. I chose this one over others because the angle…
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Apr
In my recent show The Sound of a Social Climbing Nun, I said: ‘In the eighties, people didn’t always make the right choices,’ and put up the above picture on the screen. I almost cut that from the show, because it wasn’t about Julie Andrews or The Sound of Music and was more of an in-joke…
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Apr
Were you happy with ticket sales? Overall yes. Despite two days of bizarre winter weather, on average we were 85% full. Small independent shows like mine don’t normally do as well as that at Fringe World in Perth. I’ve seen some very good shows from talented artists with mostly empty seats. Were you pleased with…
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Feb
The Sound of a Social Climbing Nun is over … for now. Here are some pictures from the final night.
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Feb
I’m having fun with the material now, and thankfully, my audiences also seem to be enjoying it. My friend John Dickie was at this performance, as he was the night before. He’d flown from Melbourne just to see it. I’ve had a few other friends come from interstate to watch the show, which makes me…
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Feb
Sharon from Canada saw it tonight, as did other fun people, including a few pirates. My friend John flew in from Melbourne for it!
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Feb
Every time I perform my show, I get an outpouring of positive respect and affection. Is there anything more affirming for an artist? These are two pics taken after the Wed 8 Feb performance of The Sound of a Social Climbing Nun.
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Feb
Ten minutes before the show, there was such a warm glow from the audience, I knew this evening was going to be special. And it was! I felt very confident with the material and everyone seemed happy to follow me anywhere. To quote a sexy former Prime Minister: ‘I’m enjoying this! I’m enjoying this!’
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Feb
What an audience! The laughs got more as the show went on. So many people I care about in the one place at the same time, plus some new fun acquaintances.
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Feb
It is so much better performing comedy before a vibrant, laughing, appreciative audience than a wall! My first preview went so well tonight (it’s early morning now!). Thank you to everyone.
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Feb
The problem with taking a photo of weighing myself was that the camera added 300 grams to the scales. Not much, I know, but when I was trying to be under 80 kgs in preparation for The Sound of a Social Climbing Nun, it was enough to make a difference. I tried lining up the shot…
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Jan
One reason I do Fringe is to meet other performers, often over drinks at the Budgie Smuggler: the late night artists’ venue. Sharon from Canada is one of my favourite. She’s back in Perth, doing her outdoor show from 27 January to 4 February at both the Cultural Centre and the Pleasure Garden. No need to…
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Jan
An evil New York City food critic, who locks her teenage child in the cellar (when she isn’t breastfeeding her), meets a barman/barista. That was the improvised musical I saw Impromptunes perform at Fringe World. Light, clever, funny, a bit naughty, but not offensive. With a Stephen King showstopper… Impromptunes – The Completely Improvised Musical…
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Jan
When I put on a show, I don’t just aim to entertain. I endeavour tastefully to inform and educate my audience. So here are two important questions if you are considering the benefits of coming to the Pirate Bar to see The Sound of a Social Climbing Nun: What will I learn about Dame Julie Andrews? The shocking occupation in which she…
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Jan
My first appearance on a Fringe World stage was not at my show My Argentina: Learning Spanish and Loving Thatcher. A year earlier, a frumpy red-headed singer called Susan Higgins pulled me out of the audience to perform a liturgical dance with her. Miss Higgins is a recurring (and determined) character, played by the funny and…
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Jan
I was very taken at Fringe World 2015 when I saw Wyatt Nixon-Lloyd: 200 Voicemails. It was about what Mr Nixon-Lloyd found when he retrieved several years of unheard voicemails from his phone. As someone who causes major commotions among friends when I deign to send text messages, and who’s received 45 ‘likes’ (and counting) when…
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Jan
What will it teach me about The Sound of Music? That it isn’t really the story of a postulate nun who melts the heart of a sea captain, teaches his children how to sing, marries him and escapes from the Nazis with her new family. Instead, it’s about a social climber who ensnares a fraudster, humiliates his aristocratic children…
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Jan
My wallet says a lot about my 2016. It has public transport cards from Melbourne … … Sydney … … Washington DC … … London … … and LA … … but no Perth SmartRider … … though I do have a Luna Palace Cinemas card …
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Dec
Earlier this year, I saw 28 of the movies at the Spanish Film Festival, which was a bit of a slide in form. I’d seen 30 in 2015. I’m not quite so obsessed about the British Film Festival, which in any event doesn’t have as many. But in addition to showing some interesting new films, it…
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Nov
Lin-Manuel Miranda might just be. He’s the writer, composer and star of Hamilton, which I saw last year on Broadway. He’s received Tony nominations for all three jobs. Yet he might end up losing the Best Actor in a Leading Role in a Musical award to his co-star, Leslie Odom, Jr. Has anyone ever lost a major acting…
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Jun
Tonight, I saw my 28th and last movie of the festival, down from 30 in 2015, but I think it still gives me some authority to make a few comments… The tactful trailer The trailer to Ma Ma suggested it was a heartwarming film about a woman (played by Penélope Cruz) dying of cancer, unexpectedly pregnant, with the…
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May
We were at Cinema Paradiso as part of the Spanish Film Festival. YOUR QUESTIONS ANSWERED Was that a record for you? It equalled my previous best, that I achieved twice at last year’s festival, but Garry has now joined the cult. Didn’t you get hungry? No. There was time to pop out between movies, though we missed some…
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May
The 2016 Spanish Film Festival starts in Perth on Thursday at Cinema Paradiso. Here’s everything I learnt in 2015: Love conquers the age barrier, if you have a shiny new car and a house with a panoramic view of Barcelona. (From the Spanish movie Sorry If I Call You Love) Be nice to older women on…
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Apr
It’s not very often I get gushy and sentimental, but it’s also my birthday. If you’re wanting something more, well, me, please click here. I saw 30 movies in 14 days at last year’s Spanish Film Festival in Perth. If you saw my Fringe show in February, you might remember three rather silly life lessons’I learned from…
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Apr
The going rate to hide out with your son in a Buenos Aires love hotel is 500 pesos a night. (From the Argentine movie Refugee) Argentina’s inflation rate could make this one out of date, though it’s hard to say what that rate actually is. In December 2013 it was said to be 11 per cent,…
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Apr
A 21-year-old man with piercing blue eyes, chiselled face, smooth olive skin, tight rippled stomach and deep Latino accent tends to smuggle commercial quantities of cocaine if he’s not involved in a murder conspiracy. (From the Spanish movies El Niño and Marshland) Click here to see who I’m talking about. Jesús Castro. At the 2015 Spanish Film…
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Mar
At every performance of my Fringe show, the three life lessons from the Spanish Film Festival got laughs: If a man keeps sending you flowers, he’s probably going to die soon, so don’t make any effort. (From the Spanish movie Flowers) A room in a Colombian love hotel is brighter than a room in a Buenos Aires…
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Feb
There’s a theory that you must be in Northbridge to do well at Fringe. My show is in Mount Hawthorn, but I’ve been getting such a warm reaction from the wonderful packed crowds: first at my previews, and now at Thursday’s opening. It’s so affirming and beautiful. I thought I’d see lots of people who knew each other – and…
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Feb
If you win a plane ticket as a prize, it’s probably part of an elaborate scheme by an awful musician to get revenge on everyone who did something bad to him. (From the Argentine-Spanish movie Wild Tales) It’s more comfortable to smuggle yourself into France on a goods train than underneath a truck. (From the…
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Feb
I made some changes for Friday the 12th’s performance of My Argentina: Learning Spanish and Loving Thatcher, and forgot every line in my final rehearsal! A half hour power nap solved that problem. I was also fighting off a sore throat, but that was good because it naturally made my voice a little deeper and…
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Feb
Wonderfully well! I was nervous before (though a chicken and egg burger helped!), but relaxed once I was on stage. That was in part because I had a great supportive audience. It was nice catching up with old friends. Being Perth, all sorts of people knew each other and met up for the first time…
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Feb
One reason I’m doing a show at Perth’s Fringe World 2016 is a show that I saw at Fringe World 2014. It was called Absolutely. I think my friend and I wanted to see something at The Blue Room Theatre, where, over a decade earlier, I’d staged both a play and a one-man show. A…
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Feb
A dramatic re-enactment of the movie Titanic, with a toy boat and ice cubes. Comedians acting out Star Trek fans who want to have operations to look like Mr Spock. The world record for most sips in 30 seconds during a Neil Diamond song. When I saw Facty Fact at Fringe World 2015, it was…
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Feb
The Fringe World website suggests that you see a random show. Which is what I did one Monday night at Fringe World 2015. I’d just seen a magic show and was going to a comedy act at a pub, but that wasn’t starting for an hour and three-quarters. I picked The Lion, The Bitch and…
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Feb
What’s it called? My Argentina: Learning Spanish and Loving Thatcher. What’s it about? How I accidentally fell in love with Argentina and learned Spanish, while: buying Evita dolls with clunky shoes; reading sexy political memoirs; witnessing the Earth’s creation near polystyrene palms; and re-living the sinking of the Titanic. Is it tasteful? Extremely. Beyond taste. Do I…
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Jan
I say ‘other’ with the (optimistic) assumption that you’re coming to my own show! In January 2014, when I opened my copy of Fringe World’s printed program, I thought – ugh! There were 418 events inside. A year later, this number had grown to 556. But between these two festivals, I’d been to the Edinburgh Fringe. That…
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Dec
If a woman claims to be your long lost sister don’t push her away since she might be a rich Bollywood star who can give you money so you can stop working as a research scientist and marry the cute video store assistant boyfriend who can’t afford a flat in the heart of Barcelona. (From…
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Dec
Be nice to older women on long haul buses, because you’ll always have a place to stay when you’re mistaken for a Basque terrorist. (From the Spanish movie Spanish Affair)
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Dec
